89: Filling Out Forms, Standing In Line

89. "Allentown" by Billy Joel {#17; 11/82} [iTunes? Yes.] {Video: Allentown. (I didn't remember this video. It's not that great.)(Unless you like shirtless steel workers.)}

This is definitely a "wheelhouse" song. Released in November of 1982, it came out early in my junior year of high school. And it reminds me, probably more than any other song, of playing church basketball. Mostly because I always changed the lyrics to:

"Everyone had a pretty good shot,
but I made sure that their shot was blocked.
'Cause something happened on their way to that place,
they had a basketball slammed back in their face!"

Yes, it's pretty silly. Yes, it's pretty stupid. But, that's how I used to always sing it, and that's how it's ingrained in my memory.

And now, because no one asked for it, my Top Five people named "Allen" (or "Alan.")

5. Alan Hale Jr.

Skipper!!!!!

Yes, the main reason I like Alan Hale, Jr. is because of his close proximity to Dawn Wells and Tina Louise. Does this make me a shallow person? Probably.

4. Alan Rickman

And I haven't even seen any of the Harry Potter movies.

The dude is seriously involved in two iconic movie quotes:

"Yippee-kie-ay, mother#@$%^*!" from Die Hard 

and

"By Grabthar's Hammer, you shall be avenged!" from one of the most under appreciated movies of our time, Galaxy Quest.

3. Alan Alda

He's eaten a river of liver. (And an ocean of fish.)

Hawkeye Pierce. Come on, he's just one of the greatest characters in the history of television! (Not as great as Frank Burns, but pretty darn great.)

2. Tim Allen

Did I mention I liked Galaxy Quest?

You know, I wouldn't really consider myself a Tim Allen fan. Home Improvement? It was okay, but nothing to write home about. (I have never written home about Home Improvement.) I have never really thought, "A new Tim Allen movie? I've got to see that!" In fact, the vast majority of his movies I could care less about. That said, he happens to be the star of two of my Top Ten favorite movies of all time, Galaxy Quest and Big Trouble. (I know what you're thinking. Big Trouble? Top Ten favorite of all time? Yes. Sorry, but I am a big, big fan of Dave Barry. I want to be Dave Barry when I grow up. And I happen to think Big Trouble is a funny, funny movie. So there.)

(And besides all of that, he is also the voice of Buzz Freaking Lightyear!)

1. Alan Page

THE Purple People Eater!

Alan Page is the reason I have been a Minnesota Vikings fan for over 40 years. (I'm not sure if this is a reason I should like him or a reason I should loathe him.)

He was the first defensive player to ever win the NFL MVP award. He is in the Football Hall of Fame. And, after he retired he later became a justice on the Minnesota State Supreme Court! (Maybe he's not as qualified for the US Supreme Court as Sandra Day O'Conner, but he definitely has more quarterback sacks than her.)

COMING UP NEXT:  Ultimo lives!