142: You Don't Have To Wear That Dress Tonight

142. "Roxanne" by The Police {#32; 2/79} [iTunes? Yes] {YouTube: Roxanne.}

"Roxanne" is the perfect confluence of prostitution and falsetto.

(As far as I know.) (Not that I've had any personal experience or anything.)

I'm trying to think of songs that have inspired more bad falsettos and I'm having a hard time. Sure, there are a lot of different songs featuring Steve Perry vocals that send men into the falsetto zone. And then there are the high notes on "Take On Me" by A-ha that get me every time. Also, for the older crowd, "Tiptoe Through the Tulips" by Tiny Tim. But I'd put "Roxanne" right up there at or near the top of that list.

While I'm here, let me point out a pet peeve of mine. (What? Me grumble and complain about something? That's so unlike me.) Looking up this song at various places on the interwebs, I've often found it credited to "Sting and the Police."

NO!!!

This is a song by The Police. NOT Sting and The Police. Plain and simple: The Police.

Yes, Sting was a member of The Police at the time, and yes, he was the lead singer on this song. But THIS SONG IS BY "The Police."

Likewise, it is never "Phil Collins and Genesis." It is either Phil Collins or Genesis. It is never "Lionel Richie and the Commodores." It is either Lionel Richie or the Commodores. It is never "Peter Cetera and Chicago." It is always just Chicago. (No one cares about Peter Cetera.)

I might be talked into accepting "The Police, featuring Sting" or "Genesis, featuring Phil Collins," but most days I don't like those, either. (Because I'm grumpy.)

Now, put away your makeup.

COMING UP NEXT: 8th grade: Who needs it?