Here we are. Finally. The HondoJoe Top 200!
200: "I'm a Yankee Doodle Dandy" by Genius Entertainment [
Available on iTunes? Not that I can find. (They changed the search functions on iTunes, and the new ones, of course, suck.)]
One day, The Wife thought she found a bargain. It was a three-cd set of kids songs called "123 Favorite Kid's Songs." (And when it says "123," it doesn't mean 1-2-3. It means one hundred and twenty three songs!) And, it
was quite a bargain. The 123 songs contained a wide variety of children's songs that we
all learned as kids, and
all kids have been learning (sometimes for no apparent reason) for generations. Songs like "There's a Hole In My Bucket," "I've Been Working On the Railroad," "The Hokey Pokey," "The Farmer In the Dell," and so forth.
Roni
loved these cds. A little
too much. She started requesting them every night.
Especially the cd that began with "Yankee Doodle." Not content with just listening to it every night, Roni began singing it.
All the time! Not content with just listening to it and singing it, she tried to get everyone else to sing it, too. The conversation would go like this:
Roni: "Do you want to sing "Yankee Doodle?"
Everyone: "No!!!"
Roni (without waiting for or paying attention to anyone's answer): "It goes like this...." (And then, of course, she would start singing it.)
The Yankee Doodle Siege lasted for about six months. Eventually, the cd got "misplaced" for a while. To this day my sister-in-law Kimmie would probably punch you in the face if you walked up to her and started singing "Yankee Doodle." But, enough time has passed since The Siege that when I hear the song it makes me think of Roni and her funny little funneryisms. And I like it.
199: "Oh Yeah" by Yello {#51, 8/87 (When applicable, I will be including the peak chart performance by the song, according to the 2006 edition of the book
Top Pop Singles by Joel Whitburn, a book a highly reccommend to anyone who likes music and likes to waste time. It is a treasure-trove of mostly useless information. Also, I will include the month and year that the song first hit the charts.)}[iTunes? Yes.]
Here's another song that is on this list because of Roni. Don't get me wrong, it's a good, fun song, and on its own merits it would have been in the "honorable mention" range along with with other quirky 80s songs like "Mexican Radio" and "Turning Japanese." But, after hearing the song probably only once, Roni one day just started doing the "cha-chikka-chikkaw" part, in a cute little whisper-sing. So, for about a week we would listen to the song and serenade each other with a "Bow-Bow" here and a "chikka-chikkaw" there. Sometimes even Buzz would join in with us.
(Also,
Ferris Beuhler is a pretty funny movie.)
198: "If I Had $1,000,000" by Barenaked Ladies [iTunes? Yes]
"If I had a million dollars (
if I had a million dollars) I would buy you some art (
a Picasso, or a Garfunkel.)" That was the line that helped move this song from "amusing" to "clever and funny" for me. Also, the line "Not a real green dress, that's cruel" struck a chord with the guy who owned a green suit hated by Aunt Maxie.
Plus, can you have too much Barenaked Ladies? Their album "Gordon," featuring this and other great songs like "Enid," "Grade 9," and "Be My Yoko Ono" made my Top 40 albums list. And their children's album "Snack Time" is a favorite around the house.
197. "Do You Like Waffles? (Sweet Suite)" by Parry Gripp [iTunes? Yes]
Any song that allows you to victoriously shout "WAFFLES!!!" is okay in my book! The whole family knows and loves this song, and we sing it whenever we have waffles. (Or pancakes.) (Or french toast.)
And, for the purposes of the HondoJoe Top 200, I'm including all five songs from the "Do You Like Waffles?" Sweet Suite as one song. The other parts are, "Waffles Are Outrageous," "Dippin'," "Got To Dip It," and "Everyone's Dippin'." They flow together as one outrageous homage to waffles. (And pancakes.) (And french toast.)
196. "Brontosaurus" by The Move [iTunes? No. But you can find the song on YouTube here:
Brontosaurus by The Move ]
"She can really do the brontosaurus. She can scream the heebie-jeebies for us." (You have to like any song with "heebie-jeebies" in the lyrics.) This is my favorite song by The Move. (The Move was the precursor to ELO. Don't worry, I'll clue you in more about The Move when I give you "The Brief (Ha!) History of the Electric Light Orchestra Family Musical Tree" in a little while.)
The song starts out with slow, deep, plodding guitars that put one in mind of an actual brontosaurus stomping around. You know, if there ever had been such a thing as a brontosaurus. Apparently, it's an extinct animal that never existed. From the "Things I Learned from the Internets" File, what we always thought of as a brontosaurus was actually an apatosaurus all along. I guess they figured this out a long time ago, but no one bothered to tell anyone in the Idaho education system. (The next thing you know they'll be saying Pluto isn't a planet!)
Anyway, it's a cool song. It's thick and chunky most of the way through, then it speeds up at the end and really gets its groove on. With apologies to Was (and (not Was)) this is the best song ever made about a dinosaur.
195. "Buddha's Delight" by Haley Bennett [iTunes? Yes, but as an "Album Only" track. YouTube it here:
Buddha's Delight by Haley Bennett]
When I listed what makes a song qualify for the HondoJoe Top 200, I forgot to mention one key category: hidden gems. There's just something about a great song that no one else seems to know about. (Kind of like how Billy Joel fans think about "Scenes From an Italian Restaurant" or "Summer, Highland Falls.") Well, this is a hidden gem song.
It also falls squarely into the "I don't know why I like it, I just do" category, too.
This song is from the soundtrack to the movie
Music and Lyrics, which stars Hugh Grant as a other-guy-from-Wham!-ish, mostly washed-up 80s musician, and Drew Barrymore as his plant-waterer/girlfriend/songwriting partner. (And yes, I know that the other guy from Wham! is Andrew Ridgely. It just sounds more fun to say it the other way.) I can't recommend the movie, but it does have a few good moments. (Especially the music video for Grant's character's 80s "hit," "Pop Goes My Heart.") (Pay special attention to the ugly drummer in the background.)
Anyway, the plot, such as it is, features Hugh and Drew getting hired to write a song for a Britney Spears-esque singer, played by Haley Bennett. This is one of her fake "hits" from the movie. (That's "hits" with an "h.")
I'm not sure why I like this song so much. It's a catchy, fun little pop song. It's got some nice guitar work and an oddly timed "La-la-la" or two. (I'm always a sucker for a good "La-la-la" or "Na-na-na.")
194. "Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor {#1, 6/82} [iTunes? Yes]
"And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night." (Nice way of slipping your group's name into the lyrics of the song!) (THANKS!)
Of course, this gets some nostalgia points as a pep band song. Plus, some good points for the driving guitar riff. When it came out, this was an awesome, rocking song! Little did we know that Survivor would soon follow the path previously taken by REO Speedwagon, Chicago, and Foreigner: The Path of the Sappy Ballads. (Dennis DeYoung tried to drag Styx down that same path, but met some serious resistance from Tommy Shaw and James JY Young.)
Bonus points for any song that brings to mind a sweaty Sylvester Stallone. And a sweaty Mr. T. (I pity the fool!)
193. "I Love You, Baby" by Brak [iTunes? Can't find it. YouTube it here:
"I Love You, Baby" by Brak] "Someone left a cake out in the rain (Oh no!) I was going to eat that cake, but now it's all wet and I don't think I want any!" Gotta love Brak! (Especially when he refers to himself as "Braky-Wacky.")
This song also was on the second or third mix-tape I made for The Wife. (And she
still married me!)
And yes, I like your Aunt Louise.
192. "Shine" by Collective Soul {#11; 5/94} [iTunes? Yes] I didn't follow music much in the early 1990s. It seemed like it was all either parachute-pants wearing buffoons (MC Hammer, Vanilla Ice, Milli Vanilli) or dirty, plaid-wearing Debby Downers in need of a good shower and some Prozac.
Not great times for music.
It slowly got better, and somewhere in the mid to late 90s I started to get sucked in to the "alternative" music that was starting to catch on. I think part of it was a desperate attempt for me to stay "hip" and "with-it." ("Stay," of course, is the wrong word there. I was
never "hip" or "with-it," not even when being "with-it" was hip.)
One of the groups I glommed onto at that time was Collective Soul. They weren't really "alternative." They were just a good, solid rock and roll band. They had good, catchy songs and weren't afraid to use a guitar. I especially liked "Shine," their first big hit, because it has a good message that they slowly and methodically pound into your head.
(I also like it when the guy says, "Yeah" throughout the song.)
191. "She's a Beauty" by The Tubes {#10; 4/83} [iTunes? Yes] "Step right up and don't be shy, because you will not believe your eyes." "She'll give you every penny's worth, but it will cost you a dollar first."
This is definitely a "Wheelhouse" song: synthesizers and guitars meshing together as they could only in 1983!
I wonder why we didn't hear more from The Tubes. I can only think of four songs by them, and I really like all four. Besides this song there is "Don't Want to Wait," "Talk To Ya Later," and "Dancin'," the song they do with Olivia Newton-John from the
Xanadu soundtrack, which is
by far the best non-ELO song on the
Xanadu soundtrack. (Faint praise, but praise nonetheless.)
COMING UP NEXT: I need a doctor for my pressure pills. I need a lawyer for my medical bills.
